Nerd? I think I finally found my place (Grok with us #3)

Hello people of the Universe !

Today, I come back to speak about something I didn’t want to admit so far : I am a nerd.

The French word for nerd is intello and it was my nickname during all the years I spent in highschool and before, in elementary school. I received it from friends, from classmates, from other students and strangers, and certainly from some teachers. At least, it was my nickname when I was not called “the brown-noser” or “the do-you-have-a-life girl”. I can’t tell you I was happy, I knew those names were very pejorative, but I acted like nothing could touch me. It was a time when I needed to be surrounded by adults that could follow and build my thoughts, and not teenagers that only cared about drinking and partying.                                                                                               I remember when a student’s dad was shocked that I hadn’t a boyfriend like any other teenager and then said “studies don’t have to be your everything !” But not every teenager needs or wants a partner, and there is nothing wrong with getting your curiosity aroused. Studies have always had a huge place in my heart. Through them, I don’t only see me learning my lessons or writing commentaries; I see me looking for testimonies, trying to understand why governments took that special decision, crying while reading Romance de la luna, luna by García Lorca. I see me groking the world and there is nothing more beautiful to me.Read More »

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How can we find empathy for people who are different than we are? (Grok with us #2)

Hello people of the Universe !

Such a deep question, right? Well, I struggled a bit to find a proper answer because “how” implies a solution and I am kind of bad at fixing things — I spent ten minutes looking at the kettle because it didn’t want to heat up water before noticing it was unplugged, and then I burnt myself with the now-hot cup of tea… What do you expect from me? Apart from my quirkiness, the real reason lays in a simple answer: empathy seems to be pretty present in my everyday life.

Just to be clear, empathy is the intuitive capacity to put yourself in somebody else’s place and perceive what he or she feels. Fyi, I am a sponge, I absorb every emotion very easily and tend to be very concerned by what is going on around me and, by extension, other people.

But how can you feel empathy for someone different than you? How can you wear somebody else’s shoes if you don’t have the same size feet? I don’t think it is only a question of understanding every detail or of being entirely similar to the other people, but more about trying, learning, asking questions, going outside of your comfort zone sometimes — all of that to make them feel supported and tell them you are not alone. I found three ways to incorporate empathy to your behavior. Read More »

Oh, are you crying again?

Hello people of the Universe !

I cry like everybody. When I am happy, when I am sad, upset, angry, surprised. I cry often and most of the time, like everybody.

Yesterday, I cried. It seems like one of the most usual event, so usual that you only need to make a cup of tea, wrap in a blanket and call a friend to feel better. It is as easy for me. But that time, I didn’t cry like everybody. I had a crisis and it is time to explain what really happened.

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During those moments, like last night, what I live is a complete terror. I feel like I don’t fit in, I need space. I feel like I am in a place I don’t know, somewhere I am not accepted, a place that rejects me and devours me from the inside. It is an absolute panic, a desperate and irrepressible wish to escape, to leave far away. My body wants to die because what it endures is painful, so painful I can’t move and have to lay down on my bed. Something overwhelms me,Read More »

My open letter to Mayim Bialik: what I have learned

Hello people of the Universe!

We are the 11th and as every 11th, it is time to speak about Mayim Bialik! *clap clap clap* Are you excited? I totally am. Life comes rushing at me again after an awful year and I can’t help notice how words, advice and support were important to my well-being during that period, and even more now. Mayim is one of these helps and today, I wanted to speak directly to her. She kind of represents everything I love in Society — I am weighing my words –, and I thought it would be a good way to share with you who I am and how I easily find joy and hope in life.                                                                   Do you remember what my dad said when she liked my comment on Facebook? Mayim herself is going to call you to have a drink soon. Well, “soon” in English and “bientôt” in French certainly have the same meaning, but obviously Mayim lost my phone number… Thus, I have only one option: write an open letter. Is there a better way to interact with a writer? I don’t think so. So here we go. This is going to be very personal, very long, very honest, but very necessary. You are warned.Read More »

How it feels to have friends

Hello people of the Universe!

My title is not complete. I should have written “How it feels to have friends when you barely had ones before“. This is the right way to begin my blog post.

I don’t really know how to call myself. We are in a world where everyone needs — or feel the need — to have a label but I can’t describe myself in one word. People say nerd and I agree. I also add intellectual, passionate, good speaker, bookaholic, questioning mind, perfectionist, idealist, caring about people’s look and opinions, rational and emotional, confused by some cultural norms and totally uncomfortable in a crowd. Among many other things.

One day, a friend called me “an old soul”. I can relate. It is the best definition I can give.

Now, you may imagine it was not easy to make friends. I didn’t play with young kids because I didn’t like that. I prefered books and drawing. I was quite bad at being mean to other kids like when you are older and try to impress and make obey the younger. I remember once, I had a huge bag full of marbles andRead More »

Do you identify as a feminist? (Grok with us #1)

        Hello people of the Universe!

12065589_1156342394393845_1153473961459685063_nToday was a lovely day. I woke up at 8 after a good night’s sleep, read a bit, checked what had newly happened on the online blah-blah-sphere and worked on my assignments. I spent several minutes looking at this beautiful blue sky and smelling wet grass before immortalizing this simple moment.

Yes, today was definitely lovely.

I went to university for only two hours and listened to a passionate teacher speak about Psychology. On my table,Read More »